Words: Will Almond
Images: Offside Sports Photography (Main) / Football Web Pages (Body)
Football is all about predictions. With your mates down the pub, at the game, or on your betting app of choice, we all just want to be right. In 2010, the world of footballing predictions got Paul the Octopus. In 2019, it’s been blessed with a supercomputer which claims to tell us how the Premier League table will finish up.
For Arsenal fans the long bad weekend continues, as the PC has them down to finish fifth, just a point behind Ole Gunnar Solskjær’s rejuvenated United. Spurs roll in third, qualifying automatically for a place in the group stage proper of the Champions League and avoiding a holiday to an eastern capital in August. N.B. If this table’s correct, Spurs will finish 20 points behind Liverpool. Twenty points. The top two have been ridiculous this season.
Meanwhile, in news that won’t surprise anybody who has watched them play recently, City are tipped to win all their remaining games and take the league with 98 points. In bittersweet news for Liverpool fans, they’re also going to sweep the table but still finish a point behind the men in sky blue (because that’s how maths works). This is all, at least, according to the boffins over at Football Web Pages.
At the bottom, with Fulham and Huddersfield already relegated, things are a little less complicated. It’s basically as you were (sorry Cardiff fans), with Neil Warnock’s men relegated fully ten points behind their nearest rivals Burnley. The computer rubs salt into Huddersfield’s wounds by forecasting that they won’t pick up a single point for the rest of the season, finishing rock bottom with 14 points. Three points more than Derby in their season of sadness, if you’re keeping score.
In what’s fast becoming a rivalry for the ages, Watford pip Wolves to seventh and secure qualification for the Europa League. Providing they don’t beat City in the FA Cup final and qualify anyway—yeah, European qualification is silly. Octopi and computers, then, both good at predicting stuff.
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