A new season means new kits. It means a few other things too; Liverpool fans claiming it is their year, Big Sam slaughtering a fellow manager after one game in an attempt to stay relevant while sipping from a mug of gravy, you and your mates back on the coach to far-flung locations.
But for now, let’s talk about kits. Here are eight we really like. It could’ve been 80, but then who has got the time to read that?
1. Puma for Olympique de Marseille (h)/(a)/(third)
Even though it’s only half way through the year, we’re very for new beginnings. It’s never too late to be who you could’ve been, who you should’ve been. Break ties with the brand who previously made your kit and start anew. Yeah, if this kit could speak we reckon it would probably say something like that.
2. adidas for Juventus F.C. (third)
This is sleek, really sleek. Sleek like that guy Jeremy you were mates with when you were 12 who styled his hair with too much Wella VO5 Wet Look gel. That was back when hair ‘clay’ and ‘mud’ didn’t exist and you had no choice but to go outside looking feral.
3. Umbro for Cape Town City F.C. (h)
Remember that show 50/50 from BBC that was on the telly? This kit really reminds of that and we think it’s ace. Is that show still running? If it’s not, it should be. Our school never got picked, never found out why, still want to know why. Also, what happened to Flynn, not his real name but can’t help but wonder what he’s doing now.
4. Macron for Udinese (h)
Lots of stripes going on, stripes on stripes. Nice collar though, really rate that collar.
5. Kappa for Real Betis (h)
More stripes. We love stripes. Don’t love stripes as much as adidas, but this isn’t adidas, they’re out, this is Kappa. Reminds you of those green striped plastic bags you would get your sweets in from the shop down the road years ago, a bit like that yeah. Well, a lot. Spot on actually.
6. Le Coq Sportif For AS Saint-Étienne (h)
This is green and earthy, like a forest. It’s the colour that comes to mind when you think about how happy your new collection of potted cacti makes you. Maybe one day your thumb will be as green as this kit, maybe one day you’ll rent an allotment and start growing your own vegetables.
7. adidas for Real Madrid (third)
This is a collab with Parley and it’s very good. A great coral colour for a great cause. Chasing Coral is on Netflix, you should definitely go watch it if you haven’t already. Planet Earth and Blue Planet are on there as well, watch those.
8. New Balance for Liverpool (third)
This, now this. The patterns on this strip remind us of that tech class when you got to use the metal lathe for the first time. The teacher hands you a small cylinder of aluminium and explains that you need to chamfer the edges. He leaves you to it and it’s going really well. Realllllly well. You’ve aced it. You’re making metal curls, it’s looking smooth, you were born to do this. Then you go and take your eye off the ball for one second and it’s fucked. You’re ruined, mate. Cancelled. Done.
If you like looking at kits, buy our ace magazine. It’s full of them.